Potty Training The Boy: The Light at the End of the Potty TrainingTunnel

The light at the end of the potty training tunnel is definitely my kid playing with a damned flashlight. Get this. He's been pee trained for about 6 months as long as he's wearing "unnerwear." But if someone puts a diaper of some sort on him, all pees are off. He'll just pee in the pull-up, diaper, whatever.

Too cool for the potty

Poop on the other hand. My lord. For months he was scared of the big potty he said. So we got a little potty. Wouldn't do anything in that either. For reals young man? And toddler poop is like Super Ew.

Finally something clicked and he used the little potty and nobody died. He told me once he didn't use the big potty because he didn't want to get sucked into the tank. "Your ass won't fit down the hole," I wanted to tell him. Instead I reassured him that that wasn't possible.

For about 5 days there was only potty poopage and it was awesome. Then there was An Accident. And another. Oh for Christ's sake, really?? You were rockin' out man!

Today I made him sit on the little potty when I knew it was about time (men, so predictable). He cried and cried and pooped twice and oh hey wait, that wasn't so bad!

Eyeroll.

Please Big Boy. Please. For all that is sacred and holy. Stop turning off the flashlight. Just be a potty pooper already.