Thursday, December 5, 2013

Why I don't have an Elf on the Shelf

I've seen the Elf on the Shelf dudes for a couple of years now and I always thought, "That's a cute idea. Some day. But not now."

Why not now?
"Elf Hanging An Ornament" by debspoons
Christmas Elf - Not an Elf on the Shelf

Well, for starters, I have two little boys. And I mean little. Silas is 3 1/2 and Sage is 18 months. While I think Si would think an Elf was cool, I'm not sure he would remain intact for very long. My kids are hard on toys - I can't imagine that an Elf would make it through a season here intact. I would find him in the back yard covered in dirt. Count on it.

Second, I just don't feel as if I have the time. I see pictures of what people do with their Elves, and while super cute, I just don't want to add that to my plate. It's 10:52 p.m. and I'm writing a blog post for tomorrow after cooking dinner, cleaning up after dinner, making bottles and sippy cups for tomorrow, and getting myself ready for bed. I'm exhausted just thinking about what I did this evening, and I can't imagine adding in "Find a place for Unnamed Elf to hang out tomorrow."

Third, I'm not sure my kids would care (yet). Silas may think it's cool to find Random (what I would name my Elf) in different spots, but I think Sage would try to eat him. Random may become Headless Random.

Fourth, I've seen your Inappropriate Elf photos and I can tell you that Random would definitely end up on that list with my husband around. Mike's not a decoration person for holidays. He would take the opportunity to make Random drink from the toilet and build a homemade bong for Random. I know this for a fact. No question.

Finally, I think I'm just not that creative when it comes to things like this. I bet Random would start off with good hiding spots, but eventually he'd get put on the back of the stove, or in the junk pile on the counter, and he'd live there until I finally put him away in late January (or whenever I found him).

The Elf is just not for us.

Do you have an Elf on the Shelf? How do you keep up with the tradition and keep it fun for your kids and family? Comment below so you can give my uncreative self some future ideas.

Photo "Elf Hanging An Ornament" by debspoons courtesy of