I'm sorry...we are breaking up.

Here's the thing: it's you, not me. I couldn't believe I fell for your same song and dance. It never fails. I see you from across the room, all dressed in your holiday finery. You start to draw me near. I know I'm the prey and you're hunting me...I hate you for it.

I'm not sure why we do this. We both know how this is going to end: me hating myself in the morning, you sitting all smug in your holiday kitschy glory. Me sick to my stomach, you sparkling with delight. I really hate you for making me go through this every year, damn Christmas dessert from hell!!!!

Yes, I love my sweets and every year, there is one Christmas dinner dessert that literally, makes me sick to my stomach and then leaves me regretting digestion. This year, it was a random cake that someone else made and for lack of better things to do, I decided to munch down. It has now been two days that I have been worshipping porcelain gods. I want to curl up in the fetal position and rock on the cold tile floor. Why do I do this to myself?!

Worse still, the damn cake, which I have no idea what kind if cake it is, is almost looking at me snugly from the kitchen counter, as if to say: I'm wonderful, you can't handle me and that's why I had to poison you. It is mocking me. I can tell. It thinks it's better than me. The way I feel right now, it must be right.

In a moment of strength or perhaps stupidity, I entered the kitchen without the villainous Christmas cake noticing. I snuck up to it and screamed out my frustrations at it: I hate you. We are so done! I'm going to hate myself tomorrow but this is a guilt I can live with. It was all hateful hateful venom spilling from my mouth....and with that, I chucked the smug Christmas cake into the trash can. I DID IT!! I beat it. I'm better than it...damn hateful full-of-arsenic-possibly-hemlock Christmas cake. Granted, I still felt like hell. My stomach was still protesting every step and every drink of water. By sending me to the bathroom continuously. Sigh!

In smug triumph, I walked away from the kitchen, as the trash can lid melodramatically closed in slow motion. I clicked the light switch off and then...I heard it. Damn cake was talking to me as it lay dying a slow death in the trash can, along with the castoffs from our delicious Christmas dinner. I'm imagining it, right? Nope. As I tried to keep my head high, I couldn't help but shiver. The cake, perhaps noticing my slight fear and weakened state, laughed darkly and shouted: I will see you next year!!

I decided not to listen, to walk away. We were breaking up. I was not going to listen to its hateful parting shot. There's no way THIS Christmas cake would come back from the dead. But as I thought back to all the other Christmases where this had happened to me, I couldn't help but think that maybe this crazy yearly break up was being handled by some vengeful ghost. Oh well...better luck next year.

                Have you had a crazy holiday food story? Tell the Mamas all about it. ;) 

Natural Beauty Tips from Abe's Market

Natural Beauty

TOP 7 HOLIDAY MAKEUP TIPS

Check out these holiday makeup tips from Katey Denno, celebrity makeup artist. They're wallet-friendly, all natural and will leave you looking perfectly polished and radiant.

Right as Red
'Tis the season to wear a red lip! Remember: A red lip can mean the most sheer wash of a rosy tinted lip balm, a slightly stained red pout, a cherry pop of gloss or an intensely bright red — or even mulberry — smile.

Let it Glow, Let it Glow, Let it Glow
My favorite look, regardless of age, skin color and style is always healthy, glowing skin. This generally means raising the stakes when it comes to adding to your moisturizing routine, particularly if you're noticing a little dryness or lack of radiance. There are countless oils and rich face creams on the market at a variety of price points with different scents, boasting a variety of features: anti-sagging, wrinkle-removing, dark spot busting.

Shimmer & Shine!
In addition to adding moisture, you may also want to invest in a good luminizing product. These come in a variety of forms, from cream to liquid and even powder. The trick is to find one that is either sheer enough that it dissolves into your skin, or one that has a little warmth to it to give your skin a healthy, warmed-up glow. Swirl it on the tops of cheekbones, down the bridge of your nose and in the inner corners of your eyes ... and even atop your cupid's bow.

Ash Be Gone
Dry winter air can also wreak havoc on your skin, which is especially important to note if you're going to be wearing any sleeveless party tanks or showing off a little leg. Finding a rich body moisturizer or oil and adding it to your post-shower routine will give you the limbs you love to show off.

Nail It!
If you want to add a pop of color to your look that is super simple and requires no upkeep throughout the evening, don't neglect your nails! Adding a bright red polish, a sparkly gold or silver glitter-filled varnish or even a sheer wash of clear for a reflective effect, can be just the thing to bring your look into the holiday spirit.

It's in the Eyes
Adding sparkle and glimmer to your eyelids or lash line can really make you feel glamorous and party ready — and can be extremely simple. Pick a shadow with some reflective component in a neutral shade and dust it along your lid and under your lash line. Add a few coats of black mascara and you're ready to party! A deep shade with shimmer in it can be applied as a liner if you wet a small brush with water, press it into the shadow and swipe it along your lash line. Voila: instant liner!

Scents of the Season
Finally, you may want to experiment with adding a slightly more wintery fragrance to really get you into a joyous mood. Think deeper, musky, woodsy or, on the flip side, clean, crisp and white. Either way, you can't go wrong with a little dab on the wrists, behind the ears and the backs of your knees!

Natural and Organic Gifts and Stocking Stuffers

Veggie Crayons for Baby and Up
Price: $12.00
Sale Price: $9.60

Wire & Bead Art Kit
Price: $19.95
Sale Price: $15.96

Sprout Bracelet/Bamboo Bird Tree Watch
Price: $60.00
Sale Price: $45.00

Bamboo Pashmina - Grey
Price: $39.99
Sale Price: $34.99

Foot Care Candy Mint Foot Cream, 6 oz.

Price: $7.01
Sale Price: $5.96

What's your favorite natural beauty tip for the winter? Share with us below in the comments!

This post was created by our friends at Abe's Market. Image Source: http://media.abesmarket.com/media/scoop/article/winterizemakeup_header.jpg 

What We Learned: December 15th edition

Always learning. Not a bad thing!! Here's what the Mamas have been up to this week:

Lisa:

1. I learned that after years of hoping and praying, the girls are die-hard Tim Burton fans. They were enthralled watching the Corpse Bride. Yesssssss! Apparently, the bride "kicks ass" and Banshee has declared that the notoriously dark music (Danny Elfman) makes her happy. ;)

2. I am feeling a bit of pressure to get well soon from my third C-section, since Sailor goes back to work this week. So, we ran some errands together yesterday and we were able to get Cubby's birth certificate. I felt like I climbed Everest!! One huge tradition here that didn't quite start as a tradition, is I like to get the kids their passports as soon as they're born or early on, as another form of ID. It started because we had to take a trip to the Philippines when Pixy was 6mos old and it remained as a "thing to do" for us. Not a bad thing to do, especially as a military wife. I hate having to carry a letter of permission from Sailor that states he knows I'm taking the kids on a trip without him for the airport staff, honestly. IDs are good!

3. I learned that I must look a sight because the librarian, who'd been hounding me to return a book I had already returned, took pity on me and removed it from my account. I told her I felt horrible because books are sacred to our house and I had ransacked the whole house looking for it....anyway, since my voice isn't quite back to its strong self due to the CSec...I must have sounded pitiful. Haha! I am STILL looking for that book in case, but man...it feels nice to not worry about it. It was a really nice book.

Liz:

1. I was reminded (didn't really learn it this year) that toddlers and Christmas trees are bad news bears. We put up our tree Friday. Silas was SO EXCITED to see a tree when he came home from school. "DADDY LOOK A CHRISTMAS TREE! OH MY GOODNESS! IT'S SO AWESOME!" That made me smile. But then once we started putting ornaments on Sage was taking them off as fast as we were putting them on, and breaking half of them. Gah! Now we have to constantly be on Tree Watch so Sage doesn't steal ornaments and break them.

Sage and Silas' Christmas tree

2. Tomorrow marks my first day of "break" from work (I'm a college professor remember). I always have all these great aspirations for break: read this book, re-prep this class...blah blah blah. This year I'm being realistic. Read (but not finish) my current book. Prepare all my classes (it's pretty easy, usually takes all of five days). Wrap Christmas presents. Enjoy my kids. Cook some yummy dinners. Done.

3. Last week I started getting back into meal planning and I forgot how much fun I used to have during the summer finding new things to make and seeing how they turned out. This week I've got three beef slow cooker recipes going on and two nights of chicken. I'll let you know what turns out the best!

Robyn:

I've learned that while pumping in the car people stare in like I have 3 heads. Then, they have a shocked look on their face when they see a little side boob. Hey, at least the main parts are covered up! 

 I've learned that the jolliest time of year is the biggest time to be an A-hole in traffic. Is this year's theme to have a 'White knuckle Christmas?' Seriously, shoppers. Calm down. 

From a student standpoint, I've learned that the national poison control number is 1-800-222-1222. It's easy to remember and worth keeping in the back of your headin case if emergency. 

Now it's your turn - tell us one thing you learned, recognized, or thought about this week! Let us know in the Comments.

Why I don't have an Elf on the Shelf

I've seen the Elf on the Shelf dudes for a couple of years now and I always thought, "That's a cute idea. Some day. But not now."

Why not now?

Christmas Elf - Not an Elf on the Shelf

Well, for starters, I have two little boys. And I mean little. Silas is 3 1/2 and Sage is 18 months. While I think Si would think an Elf was cool, I'm not sure he would remain intact for very long. My kids are hard on toys - I can't imagine that an Elf would make it through a season here intact. I would find him in the back yard covered in dirt. Count on it.

Second, I just don't feel as if I have the time. I see pictures of what people do with their Elves, and while super cute, I just don't want to add that to my plate. It's 10:52 p.m. and I'm writing a blog post for tomorrow after cooking dinner, cleaning up after dinner, making bottles and sippy cups for tomorrow, and getting myself ready for bed. I'm exhausted just thinking about what I did this evening, and I can't imagine adding in "Find a place for Unnamed Elf to hang out tomorrow."

Third, I'm not sure my kids would care (yet). Silas may think it's cool to find Random (what I would name my Elf) in different spots, but I think Sage would try to eat him. Random may become Headless Random.

Fourth, I've seen your Inappropriate Elf photos and I can tell you that Random would definitely end up on that list with my husband around. Mike's not a decoration person for holidays. He would take the opportunity to make Random drink from the toilet and build a homemade bong for Random. I know this for a fact. No question.

Finally, I think I'm just not that creative when it comes to things like this. I bet Random would start off with good hiding spots, but eventually he'd get put on the back of the stove, or in the junk pile on the counter, and he'd live there until I finally put him away in late January (or whenever I found him).

The Elf is just not for us.

Do you have an Elf on the Shelf? How do you keep up with the tradition and keep it fun for your kids and family? Comment below so you can give my uncreative self some future ideas.

Photo "Elf Hanging An Ornament" by debspoons courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

A Giveaway to Make Christmas Brighter

Growing up my (Liz's) family always had artificial Christmas trees because most of our family members were allergic to real trees. Every year it was a tradition to dig the tree box out of the porch closet (at my Grandparents') or up from the basement (at my parents') and bust out the tree and the lights. I always remember my Grandfather, Bill, having the worst time with the lights. Every year it seemed he would take them all out and lay them out flat, plug them in, and inevitably at least one string wouldn't work. So he'd cuss at that string and we'd find more. Then there were the (boxes of) ornaments that seemed to go on and on.

I always thought, "Wouldn't it be nice to avoid all this light business?" Little did I know that eventually stores would sell pre-lit artificial trees.

King of Christmas, a retailer of artificial Christmas trees and other holiday decor, is giving away a 7 foot pre-lit Cypress Spruce Christmas tree this year, along with some other great prizes (including Apple gift cards). If you're an artificial tree family, this is a great giveaway for you. If you don't have one, wouldn't it be great to be able to take out the tree whenever you wanted and set it up rather than having to go out and pick your tree, bring it home, set it up, water it, clean up after it...

Interested? Enter here. Good luck and we hope your family enjoys their family tree time this year!

Photo "Christmas Background" by jannoon028 from Freedigitalphotos.net

Loving Julep Products!

If you've been reading the blog for the past two months, you know that I (Liz) love makeup like it's my job. My recent favorite spot to shop is Julep. They offer amazing products - great nail colors, fantastic skin products, and right now everything is 50% off! What?!

Julep Friends & Family Event - 50% off!

What a great way to stock up for yourself or for Christmas gifts!

What have I received recently from Julep that I love?

Well, there's the Halloween sets (candy corn and black crackle polish with red underneath), along with the Strawberry Mint Lip Balm. The nail colors look great and I'm excited to use them in the coming weeks for fall-themed nail designs. The Lip Balm is a bit melty - something I fixed by putting it in the freezer for a bit.

Halloween sets and lip balm

Below is the November "Classic with a Twist" Maven box along with add ons. I ordered the Blank Canvas Pumping Lip Primer and the Clean Slate Polish Remover pads in addition to my Maven box which had "Sheila" and "Cynthia" nail colors along with the new lip gloss in "Glowing."

I have to say I love the Polish Remover pads. They come in little packets with ten rectangles of polish remover. You soak the nail and then rub, and poof! Color be gone! Ready to add a new one!

When I ordered my first Maven box it took almost 2 weeks to get to me (it was shipped through DHL) and I know a lot of people were unhappy with the shipping and the time it took. This month I was emailed the notice that it shipped Monday and I received my box Thursday, so I'm hoping that shipping has changed for the better.

November Maven box with add-ons

This is me with the Lip Primer and "Glowing." One of the great things about the Lip Primer is it can be worn alone or under your choice of lip color. It's lightly tinted and shines alone, and feels really nice even without color over it.

Lip Primer with "Glowing"

Have you tried Julep products? Which are your favorites? If you order before November 4th remember to use code GOCRAZY for 50% off!

Dixie Midwest Christmas Ornament Review and Giveaway - 10/8-10/27

Christmas is coming up rather quickly – scary thought isn’t it? Wouldn’t it be great if you could have all of your gifts purchased (and maybe even wrapped) prior to December 22^nd? I know that’s always my goal (although sometimes I don’t reach it).

Ever since I’ve had children I’ve enjoyed giving photo gifts to the Grandparents and they love them. This year one thought I had was to create Christmas tree ornaments with the boys’ pictures and the year. I remember as a kid my parents created ornaments or I made the ornaments, and it was always fun to take out the Christmas box and decorate and reminisce about when I was a certain age or looked a certain way.

The Cuteness!

Dixie Midwest offers a fantastic number of special gifts that you can personalize for lots of occasions. I received a personalized photo ornament for this review, and I’m excited to share my experiences with you. I sent in a digital picture of Silas that I took with my iPhone, and they positioned the photo for the best shot of him on the ornament.

Arrrr! Pirate!

I was worried that the resolution of the photo wouldn’t make for a good quality photo ornament, but I was really happy with how it looked. I chose a pirate theme for his photo (because he loves pirates these days). The ornament came well-packaged – no worries about cracking or chipping. Even as a parent, when I took it out of the package I had to “Awww!” at how cute my little man looks and how great the final product is. I will definitely be looking into other designs for the grandparents – I’m not sure they’d be as excited about pirates as Silas is.

They offer over 50 different options in terms of personalized photo ornaments – there’s bound to be one that your loved one would enjoy. With their current sales, photo ornaments cost between $7.20 and $12.50 depending upon the design.

If you’re looking for items for the kids, check out their bag tags and personalized books. How fun would their very own pirate book be?!

Want to connect with Dixie Midwest? Follow them on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest where they have some great decorative ideas pinned. You can also watch videos of how they make their products on their YouTube channel.

**I received a complementary ornament to review from Dixie Midwest. All of the experiences and opinions described in this review are my own.**

Want to win 6 personalized ornaments and a $25 Amazon gift card? Enter below! The giveaway runs from Tuesday, October 8 until Sunday, October 27th.

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