Saturday, July 20, 2013

You Don't ______ On Superman

Poop.

If that bothered you, you should skip this one.

A few months ago we tried cloth trainers rather than diapers for Silas. If you're a CD parent, I say "No wastea you money." Most can't catch a toddler poop if they tried. And the sizing is super weird - total lack of consistency across the "cloth trainer" area. Some (EcoPosh) fit his booty well, but were too loose around the legs (mess). Some (Blueberry) got too small super quick and we used the largest size they have. It's a total crap shoot (ha...ha ha OK I'm done).

And Pull-Ups? Fuggedaboutit, if your kid isn't ready to play the Let's Run to the Potty game, you are going to pay (and pay and pay) for those things...19 in a package, $7.99 ish per package...seriously? But we did them because school wouldn't do cloth trainers and Mason (Silas' BFF) was already wearing Pull-Ups so we can't be a baby and wear diapers can we? Noooooo (and thank god because the kid wore size 6 diapers for over a year and they ain't gonna fit for much longer and size 7s? Never seen 'em).

One day as Mommy shopped she saw Justice League underwear. 4T-5T. Hm. Silas had recently started asking about watching Superman and Batman (among other things) on TV, so I thought, "I wonder if this could work..." So I bought some Justice League undies for the Big Boy and stressed to him that we CAN NOT poop on Superman. We CAN NOT. He wore them around the house. He showed everyone who visited (which is just funny because the emblem [Superman, Batman, Green Lantnern, whomever] sits right by his penis...so here's my kid running up to our friends asking them essentially to...you got it...look at his crotch). We did OK at home. Not perfect, but what can you expect.

Super Undie Man running from water
Then one morning we were getting ready for school and I went to help him into a Pull Up. "No, unnerwear!" he cried. Uhhhhhh IIiiiiiii oooookkkkkkkk. So I told the nanny (Isella) the deal and suggested she put him in a Pull-Up as soon as possible. I picked him up and he was...wearing underwear. The same underwear. You've GOT to be kidding me. Isella told me he took off running to the potty whenever he needed to pee and he had not had a BM all day. Of course not. Because you don't poop in Superman until you get home apparently. Because as soon as we got home, there was Silas, apologizing to me and to Superman (come on, that was pretty funny). So he'll hold the pee, but still won't sit on the potty. *Sigh*

This has been a daily thing for almost a month. As long as he's in "unnerwear" he'll run to the potty to pee and hold everything else, I guess until he can't hold it anymore. And he doesn't want a Pull-Up. And he doesn't want to sit on the potty. Oye these children.

What foibles did you experience while potty training your kid(s)? C'mon, make me feel better...